We Didn't Belong

WOW. Guess it was perfect weather for me editing my memoirs chapter about my time in Vietnam. It brought out the good and bad feelings and memories. Almost 50 years since I landed "in-country" my feelings are still there, maybe even stronger.

In Vietnam, I was a Chaplain Assistant with the 199^th Light Infantry Brigade. I was trained as a Chaplain Assistant with MOS 71M20. Our job was being a jack-of-all-trades for the Chaplain. We were his driver, acolyte, clerk, jeep mechanic, handyman and bodyguard, among other things.

Being with the 199^th LIB, we were on the TOE of Brigade HHC. This should classify us as REMFs – the rear support personnel. The thing is, we spent most of our time out at the Fire Support Bases with the infantry battalions.

Recently I’ve been in contact with another Chaplain Assistant that was with the 199^th at the same time. It was surprising to hear how much of our thoughts, feelings and experiences were the same. I began to wonder why.

We got back to Brigade Main Base for 2 nights a week, when our Chaplain was on duty there. During that time we spent a lot of time visiting the wounded at the 2 evac hospitals. We saw very little of our fellow Chaplain Assistants – except during these visits to BMB – and then only those that happened to be in at the same time. We were never at BMB long enough to develop any friendships with the support personnel. We didn’t really “belong” to this group – we were field guys.

Back to the FSB. We lived with the grunts, rat patrol, snipers, and recon. Our closest friends were 11B, 11E, etc. For some strange reason these guys adopted us. But we never felt we really “belonged” to their group. We lived with them, drank with them, partied with them. We laughed and cried with them. We were invited to their stand down parties. But we could not “belong” because we didn’t share the field/combat experience.

Some of us ended up going out with the troops one way or another. My Chaplain wasn’t happy when he found out I went with the rat patrol when they escorted the infantry for troop insertion. Recon was willing to take me along on a short patrol – but the Chaplain put a stop to that. Others were able to spend more time in the boonies – yet we still didn’t feel that we “belonged”.

We visited the sick and wounded. We set up the Field Cross for memorial services.  We suffered survivor guilt to varying degrees. And mostly we kept it all to ourselves. After all, it was our job to assist the Chaplain helping the troops. Hell, I don’t think our Chaplains had any idea what we were feeling.

I moved on to HHB II Field Force Vietnam Artillery in the fall of 1970. IIFFV was a REMF group, but my roots were in the field. I wore my boonie hat with pride. Ball caps were required at IIFFV unless you came from a field unit. So, while I made some good friends, I still didn’t really “belong”.

When we got back to the “world”, it was difficult for all Vietnam Vets. The country did not accept and understand us. We no longer “belonged” to their social group.

Each of us handled this in our own way. I finished my college degree and used work to suppress the thoughts for over 30 years. Now, with retirement, the war in Iraq and some other catalysts I probably don’t recognize, the feelings have come to the front. And I still don’t feel that I really “belong”.

SP5 Tom “Preach” Winfield

71M20 Vietnam

T or C to Silver City

After a waffle and several glasses of apple juice, I headed off toward Silver City (taking a tourist route).  First on the route were several "ghost towns" NW of T or C - Monticello, Winston, and Chloride.

In Chloride I tourist the museum and store then.  Spend so time visited with the "owner", a life-long resident of Chloride.  Her grandfather was born in Wisconsin and published his memoirs "Confessions of a Wisconsin Farmm Boy".  Sure sounded like I have been working on,

Drove through, but not stopp, in Hillsboro and Kingston.  I noticed that the General Store and Cafe in Hillsboro was not open - just hope it has not gone out of business.  On up the Black Range. Stopped at a view area.  There was a display about the Silver City forest fire.

Since I had time, I detoured to "City of Rocks" State Park. Purchased my annual state park pass.The park is mostly camping spots and some hiking and mountain bike trails.  Interesting rock formations out in the New Mexico desert.  Shot many photos of the rock outcropping.

Was thinking of picking up a t-shirt at the sate park, but after I paid for my annual pass, they basically ignored me,  They talked among themselves not paying any attention to me.From City of Rocks,

Checked into the Motel 6 in Silver CityIt was great - then gave me a room very near the lobby and entrance.  Settled into the room and then headed to Wrangler Grill & Bar.  Had 2 pints of Amber Bock and their taco plate.  Had a nice conversation with a local "snowbird"  Spends Winters in Silcer Cioty and Summers next to Acadia National Park.

First (?) Air-Conditioned Combine

My dad and I spent many hours operating the farm equipment. When you spend money for the equipment, you need to keep it busy to pay for it. The self-propelled combine was a workhorse. My dad purchased a Massey-Ferguson combine with 13 foot grain head and a corn picker head.

The combine was running through the whole harvest season. First there was winter wheat and oats. New came soy beans. Finally, corn. In those days, corn varieties required longer growing season – so Beans were mostly done before corn was ready for harvest.

Most of the combining was done by my dad. The operator's platform was open. It was a dusty job, particularly with the soy beans. The fine “hairs” of the bean stalk would swirl as a dust cloud. The dust was having an adverse effect on my dad's health. The answer was installing a cab on the combine.

As I recall, there was a fan and filter to circulate the air. No problems in Fall, during beans and corn harvesting. Engine heat and the sun (lots of glass in the cab) kept the cab comfortable. The problem was wheat and oats harvesting. Hot Summer days in the fields.

During the Summer, we were very busy. Once I was old enough, my dad taught me how to run the combine. I am sure I was in high school (or summer break from college). This makes it in the mid 60s.

I was running the combine. It was a hot, sunny day. I had the roof and door of the cab open in an effort to keep the cab temperature bearable. My mom came out to bring me lunch. Back in the cab, the heat became unbearable. Trying to cool down, I was trying standing up on the seat, partially out of the roof of the cab. Suddenly, I felt cool, almost chilly.

I recognized the condition as being overheated (heat stroke) and nothing to fool around with. Drove the combine to the truck was parked and then drove the truck home. My mom was surprised to see me home. When I told here what happened, she got me cold water, started up a fan, and had me lay down.

When my dad got home, he said something has to be done. Can't afford missing the harvest days, but can't have heat stroke as a common occurrence. His solution was air-conditioning the combine cab. The local Massey-Harris implement dealer (Pederson Brothers Implement) said they had not heard to anyone doing this, but were interested in the concept.

Montgomery Wards had aftermarket automobile air-conditioners. They were willing to work with the implement dealer to design the application.

The Massey-Harris combine had a Chrysler slant 6 engine – no problem powering the AC pump. The evaporation unit was mounted top inside of the cab for fan blowing at the operator's face. Wish I had a photograph of the installation.

As I recall, other farmers and implement dealers came to look at the installation. The local newspaper published an article and photo about the installation. According to Massey-Harris, my dad had the first air-conditioned combine. Wards conformed this was the first time they had installed an air conditioner in a combine.

Typical, my dad did not look for any financial gain or royalty for the idea or design. As I recall, he basically let Wards and Massey have any possible financial benefits.

Son of a Sharecropper

As you have seen, I have been writing stories of my life - memoirs or autobiography or such.  At his time, "Son of a Sharecropper" is the working title.  At this time, I have the following chapters in the works or planned.

4-H - Head, Hands, Health, & Heart
AC Combine - First Air Conditioned Combine?
Army - Draft to deployment to Viet Nan
Dad as a Farmer - Progressive farmer - at the cutting edge of farming
Destined to be Engineer - Early days that steered me into electrical engineering
Dunbar - the family property in NE Wisconsin
EMD-GM - Highlights of the 30 1/2 years I worked for Electro-Motive Division of General Motors
Old Farm House.  Memories of the house I grew up in
Residences - Places and houses I have lived in.
School Daze - Elementary school, high school, and college
VFW - Membership in veteran's organizations
Viet Nam - My Army tour in Viet Nam
WA9LKD - My hobby of Amateur Radio
Health Problems - Stroke and heart valve replacement
Cycling and my Bicycles -
And, how could I not write about retirement!

Chapters of the autobiography will not follow a typical time line.  Instead, they will be highlight various subjects of my life.  The first chapter (and title chapter) will be used to time everything together.